The good, Joseph and I have a house! A house, after three years of living with my parents we are going out on our own, and I am excited. A house, and a place for us to call home, a little house, on the lake, in the bay, currently covered in toxic blue green algae blooms, but really, let's not be cynical. It's also right down the road from one of the best kept secrets in the FC, VT, Kilcare State Park, fantastic swimming and one of my favorite places to watch a sunset, while swinging with my boy.
We swing, he facing me, making us look like a four legged spider, pumping away. He likes it when I sing, usually I sing the blues, even when I'm happy, it's easy to get a good blues riff going...I think I'll work on something else, we'll get back to that.
So we have a house, no neighbors upstairs, none downstairs, a full yard, a full house, a cozy cottage. I've been decorating it in my head, I'm looking forward to spending winter on the lake, looking out on the bay to Georgia Shore through the huge picture window in the living room, taking walks on the frozen ice, island hopping, it's going to be fun, and next summer, hopefully, I'll have a kayak that I can launch from my own back yard!
So it's a good start, as good a day as any to launch this, because this is supposed to be a journey, life. The house is an up, and a good turn, and it feels like it was supposed to happen, and I'm grateful, I really, really am.
So one leg of the trifecta is complete, we have a house...working on the possibility of a new job, feeling stuck in the current one, that will change too, I can feel it.
The one that isn't looking so good is the department of love. A recent blow to the heart has got me drooping, but I'm going, and I'm feeling, which for me is pretty huge, to recognize that I hurt, and that I'm sad, and just feel it...hmph, this is sad, I don't like it, but it's here, it's where I'm at...and then I remember to breathe, and it feels good to breathe, in, huge, out, pushing it all out, and there is peace in there, in the breathe, and it feels...alive.
